As you might expect, we see a lot of wild things. I mean wild in every sense! We see wild flowers, wild animals, wild people, wild encounters, wild weather, wild places, and just wild things in general. It’s hard to imagine, but I much prefer wild things to anything else.
Somewhere along the path we lost our fears of most wild things. We forgot about the scratches and the thorns. The dangers were just dangers. We became more in tune with what we were doing. We became in tune with each other. We became in tune with nature. We became wild things.
It wasn’t apparent just how wild we had become until I got laid off recently and was removed from the wild places for a while. Don’t go sniveling now about that – it’s a story for another day. I look back, even right now, and it’s hard to believe we had become that wild. It’s a little scary actually and a lot exciting. I can’t wait until the day I truly become wild….through and through.
We stopped thinking in terms of us in a wild place – instead the wild places were comforting. It was as if we couldn’t breathe, grow, think, or operate if we didn’t go into the wild for a while. We would mope in the office. Send emails about our next adventure. We would talk about only how we couldn’t wait to get out into the wilderness. It seemed only natural that we should want that.
What I didn’t realize was that the transformation was much more complete than I could even know. We had grown roots. That reached in the soil when we exited the truck. We touched plants as we walked and smelled things. We didn’t talk as much. We just were. We knew some of these wild places well. We started taking a lunch and exploring. Sometimes we would lay in the weeds under a tree and just listen and talk quietly.
We started talking about things we didn’t want to. We started sharing pain. We started letting out those things in us that needed space – wild space. We talked about life and death. We relived moments best forgotten. We let leaves stay in our hair as we cried and screamed out those things that hurt us or made us feel angry. We vented. We gave it all to the wild things….and they absorbed us and our hurt. They absorbed our sorrows and our tears fell on fertile, willing soils. We became freer, lighter and more eager to let things out.
Next came the joys. We laughed and sang more. We connected in our work. The work was better and so were we. We knew more, we lived here. We felt things that needed to be done. We realized how happy we were out in the wild. We loved the wild things. We wanted to stay here. Every day it became more difficult to drag our gear into the truck. I would touch one thing more before raking myself out of the grass. We became something amazing.
I can’t say when or where exactly. I only know that we became less of what most people are and more of what most wild things are. We were something new and old. We weren’t just working. It became personal and we became passionate about our work. It stopped being work. We stopped just working. We started feeling it, breathing it, and it coursed through us like the blood through our veins.
It would have been so easy to keep going. One day, just keep walking into the woods. Grab handfuls of grass and leaves and just lie down in the mud. Float downstream and laugh at the fish watching the wild girls float by. There are days I wish we would have kept going, kept floating, kept breathing…Kept going wild.
I was there. Thank you so much for this mini mind getaway π
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Jacuqe, you have beautifully written into words exactly how I have been feeling. This was incredibly moving. I LOVE YOU!
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I was thinking of you today and felt a little inspiration come on! I think we need some WILD TIME>>>>>
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Jacque, you have beautifully written into words exactly how I have been feeling. This was incredibly moving. I LOVE YOU!
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You know me. All I write is true. It always will be. I love you too my wild thing!
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Too bad I’ve known you for 5 years and can’t spell your name right π
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Jacque, you voice SO WELL the things we feel … thanks for being able to put it so magnificently into words … Cyn
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Cyn – we feel them – it makes it easy to let them loose now because I have been freed of some of the bonds….I understand now that it is more important to say it. I miss you and hope this holiday will be good to you. I have a gift for you. I hope I get the chance to give it to you soon. I am headed your way next week – need your schedule!
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Jacque my dear — I miss you soooo bad. I miss your monthly visits to the Range … and getting to see you on a more ‘often’ basis. I too wish you the bestest of holidays, and I too will have a gift for you … working on it furiously now. I’m thinking, I’m going to change it up a bit… so this weekend I will hopefully have more time to complete it. Ha ha I cant wait to see your face
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Well, I made your gift while on my relaxing and full of love vacation!! Can’t wait to give it to you….it’s nothing fancy but it’s personally made so you will feel the love in it! I am having my friend park his pop up camper at our house this weekend. We host a party every year for a bunch of fun (and quite ignorant but fun) people. We do a pirate gift exchange and have cocktails and sing and have a little fire and enjoy the season and friends….wish you could come!!
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I certainly empathize with your becoming wild: I’ve experienced this myself when, as a young consevationist out in the hinterlands of Northeastern California – amongst the fescues and bluegrasses, sagebrush and ceanothus, juniper and pine, old lava flows and rainbow obsidion, ‘roo rats and coyotes, and the deer and antelope – yep, they really do roam out here! Knowing the names of all my wild environmental mates brought them closer into my wild family. I mourned their fate at the hands of the ecologically illiterate. I rejoiced at finding a lone remanant of a higher ecological state hiding out in some protected niche. I both dammned the livestock that brought destruction to my wild world and realized, too, that they could help heal their past destructiveness if only their masters would change. “Cows don’t overgraze, people allow cows to overgraze.” I marveled at the tenacity of individuals in my wild world – sagebrush growing out of a crack in the lava – and realized that my world could heal itself if only allowed the time and rest to do so.
I never spoke of this wildness to my spouse at the time: it was such an unspoken part of who I was that I didn’t even verbalize it to myself – it was just “that feeling” that came over me when I was “in my element.” Even if I had spoken of it, I didn’t think she’d have understood. Maybe I should have shown her that passionate side of myself – that side that exhilirated in the smell of junipers after a rare summer shower, seeing the bright red columbine along an ephemeral stream flowing through grey-black basalt, or watching a doe and her fawn browsing in a patch of ceanothus. Maybe if I’d said something we’d still be together; I guess it was a guy-thing that kept my passion unspoken.
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What a pity! Such poetry and passion would inspire many a Chicks…! If all is not lost, maybe you should pen that out in a nice hand on what my mom calls “good” paper and send it…hell send it anyway. Just remember to find something wild. Someone who knows how hard it is to tear yourself from the tall grass when the wind whispers for you to stay. How amazing a dewy spiderweb feels across your face at sunrise. What it’s like to hear everything speak to you in damp shadowy voices.
Your story is sad and beautiful. Consider becoming a guest here! You’ll fit right in – breasts are not a requirement – they just aren’t a hinderance. Thanks for speaking in your wild voice. We speak the same language here.
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Your best post! Too few understand these feelings –
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I think I find more who understand each day. This thrills me and I am lucky you came and enjoyed!
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All my nature-lovin’ gal-pals love it!! I could recruit a bunch for you!! π
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Well, an order of 12 shirts is best prices!! If you know 12 women who want shirts, I will get you a real deal!! I have two myself and still want more anyway! Let me see what I can do to get a store up and running right away!!! Love ya honey honey!
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“… we lost our fears of most wild things. We forgot about the scratches and the thorns. The dangers were just dangers…we became less of what most people are.” This feels like a breath of the freshest air. Thank you.
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I do hope we become less and less until we just are! Thanks for enjoying it. I love the feedback.
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Thank you very much for subscribing to my blog and i hope you enjoy my posts, i will subscribe here for you, Harry
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Loved your sense of humor!Very cool of you to visit…hope you actually enjoy yourself!
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thanks for that.
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This was a wonderfully moving post, and I ESPECIALLY enjoye the last paragraph… about wanting to just become a part of it all and never leave …
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Beautiful photograph.
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Thank you – I am very fortunate for see so many beautiful things but this is a work by an independent artist who is named in the metadata….I can send you a link to the site – his work is amazing! He expressed it perfectly!
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I love being in the wild. My favorite time is when the creeks are rushing water and jumping off the waterfalls.
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Mine too Sara no H – I am looking forward to SPRING!! I love when all the wild flowers are in bloom! Thanks for visiting.
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chicks with tricks, would you like to vote for me at the link below please.
http://thedarkglobe.wordpress.com/2011/12/20/the-inaugural-dark-globes-artist-awards-voting-has-begun/
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Real excellent information can be found on website.
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This is such a quirky and interesting place to come and visit! I’ll be back! Thanks for coming by and liking my blog! π
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To be wild, most interesting I was raised that the out of doors was natural and normal and a safe and nurturing environment. We often refer to “Mother Earth” and “Mother nature”
Now Mother nature can be a real bear, she has very strong rules and there is no tolerance, if one runs naked from a steaming sauna into 120 below to roll in the snow—–You will chill out,
If you walk on thin ice, you might as well tap-dance cause it will break!!!!! And as one feels the frigid water as it s-l-o-w-l-y wicks its way through long underwear and heavy clothing upward as one slides downward into frigid, moving water——one realizes that one of-mother Natures rules has obviously been broken!
This sort of experience may be considered “wild” but it is just dealing with the laws of nature, so when I venture out into “The Bush” I just sigh with relief and think and feel and say,”Hi mom. I’m Home!!!!!
dje
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This is an awesome post. I can so relate to your wildness. Thanks for describing it so beautifully.
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Just found this blog via a forum on LinkedIn & am loving it! I’m an environmental scientist in Missouri now, but formerly of Louisiana, and this post makes me miss my days out in the swamps & bogs and wetlands…but most particularly rides on oyster dredges & airboats! Thank you for the mental vaycay!
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Hey! I could have sworn I’ve been to this website before but after
reading through some of the post I realized it’s new to me.
Anyhow, I’m definitely glad I found it and
I’ll be bookmarking and checking back often!
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Reblogged this on Chicks With Ticks…. and commented:
As I text Kristen between tears, I realize how long it has been since I have gone deep into the woods….and Now i understand my tears….
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Thank you!
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